A woman of strength.

I don't know how to start all this since you were the one who gave me this idea of writing something about us. Frankly, I don't exactly know what to say. I've been blank for a couple of days and every word I feel like saying don't just come out. Plus I can't focus since these tears just keep from falling. I don't know why, and I fvcking hate myself for crying from time to time for four consecutive days.

Thank you. I guess that would be the only thing I would never get tired telling you. I have so much to be thankful. Being your friend and having you in my life is just one amazing blessing. Baby, THANK YOU.. SO MUCH.. For just being there. For just being around. And for staying.

Thank you for understanding all versions of me. From being the childish to the matured one, my crazy side, my stupid ideas, and my silly self. We've been three years friends and I could somehow say that you know me well than any of my other friends. If I say I'm okay, I know you wouldn't still believe me because you know I'm not. When I say I'm not hurt, you would always ask if I need someone to cry on or would just offer a hanky to at least make me feel alright. When I fake my smile, you would hug me the moment you know tears will come out. When everyone thinks I always come off strong, you know how I am broken inside. You know every piece of me, every piece I am trying to hide. 

Thank you. For not getting tired of hearing my stories over and over again. For not getting tired of giving advises of what I should do and what I shouldn't. For not making me worry and hesitate to tell you my problems, because I know whatever the situation is, whether I'm at fault or not, you'll understand me anyway. For repeating warnings I should've learned from the start. For all the moments I spent with you for all those wouldn't cost any wealth in the world. And most of all, for not only being my friend, but also for being my sister/my phonepal buddy/ my adviser/ my life-to-death friend.

How am I suppose to give back at least half of what you have given me? You've given me so much strength and courage in times I don't know where to stand in life. You've given me all uplifting words to cheer me up every moment I don't understand His plans for me. I don't know how dear. All you've given me are all too much of what I asked. 

Don't leave. I can't afford to lose you. You know how it breaks my heart to be left by someone so important. And I have my heart broken so many times by being left. And right now, my heart is still broken to pieces. Please stay. Please. 

I can't promise you anything, because since the day I was left by someone who told me he wouldn't, I hate promises. But one thing is for sure, time wouldn't allow us to be together every minute of our lives, but I would always be in your heart. Things would change sooner or later, but where you stand in my life would never ever be. 

PS: I would never be a woman of strength if not because of them, Him, and You.

                                

  

Found this picture three months ago. Remember this day? When we went together to the church and had dinner. Never thought in three months time, everything would make a complete turn around. Ay, how fast things changed. I miss the day, and the person we were with.